ok i think i'm most probably going to iguana tonight.

last night's party thing was pretty cool because i moderated myself and saw other ppl get drunk and die. then i drums on rockband hahahaha and owned everyone at winning eleven....ok maybe i lost to one guy but no big deal

come back home in the morning and knock out

one more party tonight...one more

HAPPY 2009!

IF I WAS IN WORLD WAR 2 THEY'D CALL ME SPITFIRE!!!

hahaha just spent my last 100 bucks on the prodigy ticket and i cant fucking wait!!

oh and i was wrong abt the conclusion.....tonight also got another party hahahhaaha

and last night i had beer with ravin since he decided to come over to my place at 1am....tonight drink....tmrw NYE confirm drink omg i never drank so much alcohol in such a continuous period of time in my life before.

konichiwaaaaaaaaaa

woah im on a frenzy right now creating tracks, crafting them properly and trying to liase with people from around the world to collaborate with me. Right now i've got a rapper from India who has done collaborations with producers in USA and holy shit he does sound like a real rapper....not even a trace of the kooky indian accent. So now i have to come up with a track for him to rap on and he doesnt mind something like prodigy or massive attack...this is gonna be interesting.

im also looking for ppl from Sweden, South Korea and Canada among other local acts....at least it will give my album a slightly international feel. So exciting cant wait to work on it.

Now that I'm done with the script for Amnesia i think i still need to go thru it a few times and really fine tune it before i start looking for investors.

Pufferdog is picking up and i'm working on getting it out of the online market....trying a few possible avenues so gotta wait for that.

Ok and i just created a working album cover for V2.4. Thats what the new EssaiveE album will be called.......2.4 basically cos im 24 hahaha.

hahaha i got alcoholic chocolate for christmas


ok and that concludes the mad week of partying and drinking now time to start working out again and burn all that whatever i been accumulating.

hanging out with different friends and meeting new people is something i never had the chance to do the past 3 years and im glad im finally doing this now.

meeting with inqbox on monday hope it goes well.

in a space of 24 hours, i created one chillout track, one industrial rock draft track and one progressive trance track.

i love my versatility.

OMG eat and drink eat and drink the past few days i need to work out

ok at least got match tmrw

more parties and hanging out wahwhahwhahhwhaa

im highhhh

haha im so turning into a fucking indian by drinking almost every other day

but roomful of blues is an awesome place with an awesome band with nice awesome people though i was probably one of the youngest there hahaahaahaha

had like 9 glasses of asahi hahahahahahahahahahahaha


im happy merry christmas

wah i realised i didnt blog the past 2 days hahahaha

past few days was pretty fun...went for some party which i thought was gonna be a flop but turned out quite happening anyway and suddenly i got so many new friends in my facebook hahahhah.

oh and i been playing with reason and came up with 2 new tracks and they're available for listening at http://amp.channelv.com/essaivee

christmas is coming and it feels different as compared to previous years. maybe cos this is the first christmas in a long time im celebrating as a single person haha but its ok not so bad.

fucking relatives coming over gonna try to stay out as much as possible and avoid.

merry christmas to whoever is reading this.

I PASSED BY IPPT WOOT

with incentive somemore it means i get $100.

what amazes me is that i managed to do that even after all that smoking and boozing lol. I can still do 2.4km in 12 mins.....ok so i got a little lucky with my standing broad jump....fluffed the first attempt but managed to get 225 for the 2nd so not so bad....at least silver standard.

fucking sg vs viet match was a waste of time....pay money to see sg lose...but the fights among the fans after the match was pretty entertaining though

heeeeeee reason so fun

gonna restart my EssaiveE project and work on a collaboration with Hanz.....doing electrojazz and trip hop....cant wait to do shit.

i FINALLY got Reason 4

holy mother what a fucking software! what have i been missing out on all this while man. Within an hour just 1 hour and i managed to create a song AAHHAHAHA im so gonna have fun using this software. It has everything i need, a million times better than fruityloops!

so now time to prioritise. Need to start creating tracks for Pravda and set a jam date after christmas. Then gotta start on EssaiveE solo shit, then do effects for NIA. Thats for music and see when Fezz free to start work on Kimochi Productions....thats another interesting one im looking forward to.

Now i just need my Reaktor and I'm a happy man.

Oh and i love the weather the past few days really awesome and tomorow IPPT test hahaha 2 days of alcohol i hope i dont fuck it up.

i know this is the 1392843809th time im saying this but...

im highhhhhhh

hahaha met up with porky, fezz, umar and farrell and we went to cafe iguana. Just like we been doing the past 2-3 years at this time of the year. First we had the micheladas followed by the frozen margaritas then the mars bar then came the killer'

DONT EVER FUCKING TAKE THE MUY CALIENTE EVEN IF UR LIFE DEPENDED ON IT!!!

it basically is tequila brwed with chillies and jalapenos. OMFG i took a shot, i felt my entire lips, throat and stomach go on fire. I felt it go down, start a war in my stomach and come back up in an explosive expulsion....basically i puked.

that aside, im still feeling fucking high. I chatted up 2 japanese looking chicks only to find out they're from china ahhh what a major turn off.

im highhhhh floating like a bird i love the world spread the love fuck fuck fuck wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee


my stomach still feels like shit.

woah i cant believe i can pass my 2.4km run even after all those cigarettes hahaha and i made friends with the PTI. I guess its true how one can go to another country and totally blend into the crowd until u cant differentiate if hes local or not. Shit man all along i thought he was a Singaporean chinese.....turns out he was born in S. Korea. Wheres that korean accent mannn?



Now that the 4 designs are out i need to start making catalogs and doing pitching to sell them on consignments. Hope that turns out well...oooh hehehehehhehehehehehehhe

i always wondered...which is worse? getting an STD or an unwanted child?

oooh my ippt this sunday and im feeling fitter....my arms look bigger and i feel stronger after all that working out.

and and and realised i have a thing for korean girls......i find them really classy and down to earth, not like the pretentious materialistic egoistic singaporean excuse for women.

haha my first malay speaking role on television.

ok fine so i fluffed my lines and the director had to give me simpler lines but still i think i did a pretty decent job.

pretty nice people to work with heh.

Zoukout was awesome!!

it was also a very fucking tiring day.

woke up in the morning to collect namecards, then had to rush down to bukit panjang for the match which didnt turn out that well and then rush back to sengkang, helping my team mate up to the clinic (he injured his leg and couldnt walk) then rush home change and rush to harbourfront to meet ravin and drink some shit. By then i was already starting to feel sleepy so i knew it was gonna be a long day.

so let me see, i had 1 tall can of barons before we went in...then i had 2 bourbon cokes, 2 whiskey sodas, 1 whiskey with green tea, 2 heinekens and i really lost track of what else i drank but to cut a long story short, i was high and happy.

now one thing i noticed abt zoukout was there was a plethora of chicks, hot chicks EVERYWHERE but the problem though, most of them are SPGs. You can turn and look at one hot girl then suddenly she will talk to her bf who happens to be some fat ugly white guy.

ok lets see..i made a mental list of some hot chicks i spotted.
1) the lady in the pink dress i saw in the train who looked suspiciously thai
2) the chinese chick in the brown bikini
3) another chinese chick i was this close to dancing with (if not for the stupid motherfuckers who kept walking btwn us)
4) the pink bikini girl who ravin and i agrees has the most stylish dancing styles
5) that chick who called me an arsehole within 2 mins of knowing me (cos i kept making fun of her height)


haha so fun

that aside, the music was awesome, loved dirty south and above and beyond's sets. I think i smoked way too much for my own good.....and so therefore im not smoking at all today.

and true enough i bumped into that woman there.....tried to ignore but impossible cos we got too many mutual friends so i just played along. I didnt want to ruin a perfect day and besides i was high so just pretend shes one of us.

woah i only slept at 9am this morning and i had to wake up at 2 for RT blahhh

tomorow got some shoot for Suria....and im supposed to be a shopkeeper

so much for stereotypes.

woah tomorow is gonna be a fucking busy day


morning wake up go collect namecards

then go to bukit panjang for match against the belgians (match captain)

then rush back home to sengkang

then meet ravin and go zoukout

fucking bitch will be there just hope my mood wont get spoilt

must remember to bring change of clothes and top up ez-link card....


hope i have fun tmrw.

I AM HIGHHHHHHHHHHH

hehehehehehehehehehehhehehe

fuck i feel bad i asked my dad to buy back dinner he bought back 2 packets this was at 6pm i got home at midnight and saw the 2 packets still outside, wanted to eat them but they smelt funny (obviously) fuck now i feel bad.


no wonder my parents dont rweallyl like me la im quite a fucked up son.

i think they secretly wish i fuck off asap since im like not earning any money and contributing to the family blahhhhhh

now i remember why i was so depressed that time it all stemmed from this

fuck fuck fuck its not like i dont want to work what...i just cant seem to find any jobs and im the kind of person i need to like what im doing thats the reason why i dont follow people's advice and just take ANY job i can find. i find this whole logic fucking stupid,. So if you find a job which you dont like but it pays then whats the point? you wake up, go to work go back home sleep and wake up to work the next day its just the same vicious fucking cycle over n over again. no wonder people kill themselves.

i know what im doing in life is definitely unconventional but at least i enjoy what im doing...fuck now what i need to do is to find a way to make money while at it. its the whole financial issue that is pissing me off.

fuck la i dont want to work for other people. i like doing my own thing and living my own life i dont see why i have to follow everyones ideology of "ok work for this company, let them exploit you but its all for your own good cos u will gain experience".

experience ki lan la...i know how to learn something fast...whatever ppl take 3 mths to do i can do in 3 weeks i dont need to subject myself to such bullshit just fr the sake of experience fuck that.

people probably think i dont know what im doing with my life, i say fuck them, fuck the people who believe in such shit, fuck the conformists and fuck you for reading this and disagreeing with me.

music really perks me up.

i remember when i was about 6 my parents tried to make me learn the piano....i went up to grade 3 and quit cos i felt it was a waste of time, utter boredom.

who would have thought that 18 years later i would actually be so into music, listening to all kinds of music, spanning all genres and actually playing in a band, writing my own music.

seriously weird coming to think of it....i reallylove music as much as i love soccer. Just 2 of the very few things in the world i can never get sick off. Metal, rock, trance, electronica, jazz, blues, funk...you name it, chances are i have heard it.

i still cant stand hip hop though.

ooooh im gonna be home alone the whole week

ooooh can get J to come over

oooooooooohhhhh

oooh match this saturday against the Belgian association and guess who's gonna be the match captain hahaha



i can just picture a very fiery team talk before the match.



being captain is one thing, leading by example is another but most importantly, i have to teach the rest how NOT to fear the opponents. I cant wait for this sat's match.

I dont care what people say but I love this design. Its techically my first ever design which i hand drew from scratch. No editing or whatsoever, all totally freehand. Wheeee im improving heheh

whee i havent felt this happy in a long time

other than some moron who keeps nitpicking at of all things, our photography, the general consensus on pufferdog is pretty positive.

met up with J and her uni friends...omg they remind me of my ex classmates from the adv diploma...all so friendly and talk cock. I havent had so much fun in a long time.

J likes me hahahaha so cool.....but sad she has to go back to melbourne in feb...well gotta make do with whatever time there is left.

cant wait to start work on the handphone.

J and her friend damn cute hahaha.....i never met a filipino girl in my life who knew the meaning of the word onomatopoeia. OMG

friday night was fun i like her company, shes hilarious and talks a lot of cock. I made a mistake of telling her my phobia of lightning now she keeps finding opportunities to laugh at me cos of that blah

ehhh she online but not talking blah....i thinkkkk she may have a thing for meeeeee hehehheh so fun

6 goals in 4 games hahaha thats an awesome record

shoot went damn well....im proud of Hakim, his firs photoshoot and he was pretty confident. Jess is a natural...really appreciate their help.

Eggplant out tomorow....probably gonna spend the whole night working on the photos.

ok so im gonna go into today's match with a swollen left knee...fuck.

oh and pufferdog is starting to get orders haha this is so exciting. photosoot tonight with hakim and jess for eggplant. Cant wait to release that and then subsequently, cherry poppin. Surprisingly among the 3, cherry seems to look the nicest on white but wonder if it will sell.

yesterday was fun oh and sixx is an awesome band, love the female vocals...her voice is so omg and i didnt know the male vocalist is my friend's brother hahaha. they play like funk, fusion....really good shit.

weather is such a bitch...its too hot and rains at the wrong times seriously.

You cannot escape the long arms of Murphy's law.

1 down, 2 more to go.

Im glad things are starting to look up for Pufferdog again. A lot of people think Kick ass is well....Kick ass....now if only i can get them to buy my shirts hahah.

RT was not bad but i still and will always hate running.

I was surfing thru myspace and OMG the panopticon!!! i havent heard it for 4 years and suddenly it came back....i cant believe i was so creative back then...wasted the recording quality was shitty..but it will always have a special place in my heart.

then i decided to check out the youtube videos of As Seen From Above....omg really nice hahaha fuck im blowing my own trumpet

Annddddd i have a date tomorow! ok not officially a date but i know it will be...so fun so exciting i havent been this excited in a long time hahaha

time to work hard on pufferdog, come up with new designs, hunt for shops willing to sell on consignment, keep 40% for company and use turnover as capital for new designs...i just hope it will work i pray..

oh and match this saturday...so much pressureeeeee

wasted im broke

okay pardon my ignorance but what the hell are apple bottom jeans?

ohh amnesia dialogue is 75% done...I'm pretty proud of some of the scenes in there...some really powerful ones like a mother huddling her 2 kids while debt collectors are in the background confiscating items....and the kids ask their mother whats going on and where their daddy is....of course the mum has to fight back her tears to tell them that daddy is still away and lie about the people in the house....its a representation of how people have to deal with the consequences of other peoples' misdealings...i really hope the actress who gets that role does a wonderful job with that...and its my job as the writer/director to make that happen.

vel vel vel is such a life saver.....the shirts are finally with me....3 designs and im starting to get orders for kickass...just need to do a bit more advertising n promotion and things will look better.....really have to thank K for the last minute injection to make all these a possibility.....i really really really hope things will become better from now on...

oh i need models...who can model for free hahah

its good to finally start shedding off all the elements that has been corroding my system. Time for a fresh start and what better way to do so then by gaining sole proprietorship of pufferdog. Yes initially it was a partnership, it was supposed to be our baby but how the hell you dare to call this your baby when you only log in once a month to check for orders....her heart was obviously not in it...she was just basking in her moment of freedom and living out her fantasies too much to give a shit abt me or the company so fine....i'll look after it myself.

now that K is gonna pump in more than the initial investment, i shud be able to collect the 3 new designs today. I know there is demand for kick ass...i always had hope for that design but she was always against it....at least now i can work in peace knowing i can release whatever i want to, because i know what people want.

and to think that initially i wanted to call it toxic tree but she was against it so fine..pufferdog...and look who ends up fucking up lol.

im just glad its over seriously, now i can move on to greener pastures....i know there are girls out there who are more deserving and more patient and definitely not out to make me insane.

oh oh and amnesia is 42/75 done....or rather 14/25 that shud be 56%....ok nvm still long way to go.....but the SPG scene was definitely based on real life experiences hahaha.

okay so now theres 4 to choose from

j is fun to talk to..a lot of similarities and conversations seem pretty endless...havent experienced something like that in ages....and oh my god sentosa looks damn ugly now from vivocity haha

RT not so bad la....all bo chap people in there so not so bad.

well at least now theres new things to look forward to. I pray this will be a better month.

Reds is nice to smoke sometimes....can feel high